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Your Safety Quotient

May 6, 2018 by Clara E Minor Leave a Comment

What is your Safety Quotient?

Self-Defense - Santa Cruz, CA

 

Level of Confidence

How is your confidence level when it comes to self-protection? If you were to give it a number from 1-10, your ‘safety quotient’ would be at what level?

Knowing you can absolutely take care of yourself, should a challenging situation arise, is self-confidence. Confidence isn’t thinking you would do this, or you would do that. Being ‘cocky’ or arrogant is not confidence either. Cockiness and arrogance are just masking fear (but that’s another story).

Confidence is knowing your body—not your mind—has a full ‘library’ of movement that will go on auto-pilot when your nervous system tells it to. This does not happen automatically—your muscles must be trained in order for your nervous system to give them the okie-dokie to go into safety-defense mode. Otherwise your muscles will move (or not move) with the memory they currently have programmed into them. The current ‘untrained’ memory might not be best suited to react favorably. And it may very well already be well-suited. Only you absolutely know your truth. Either way. What do you rate yourself right now, from 1-10?

 

Repeated training will make all the difference

Why is ‘fighting’ so foreign?

Most of us were not lucky enough to grow up learning self-protection skills along the way, simply by ‘play-fighting’ with our siblings/cousins/friends. Our parents didn’t teach us much except to not talk to ‘strangers.’ Most women were taught, as girls, that fighting was just for boys. Consequently as adults, many women have no clue how to defend ourselves (which is learning how to fight…yes, I said fight). And we simply don’t think about it. Why? Over the years, I have heard all these reasons:

• Don’t think we will ever be attacked
• Haven’t been attacked yet, so why think about it
• Too busy with too many things to do
• SHOULDN’T have to learn to defend ourselves because it is wrong, and it’s against the law for others to attack us (FYI, perps don’t care)
• The police will help; or someone will come to the rescue (boyfriend/spouse/brother—simply because he’s a man, or they do martial arts/MMA/kickboxing)
• I’m a lover not a fighter
• Fighting is for males, and besides, it is violence
• Don’t think about it, therefore won’t be attacked

How many other reasons can you think of?

All this thinking has set us up to say ‘it’s not for me.’ After all, there’s:

• shopping for groceries
• taking the kids to school
• board meetings
• work
• housekeeping chores
• filling out forms
• dentist appointments
• calls from kid’s school
• volunteering for the next event
• meeting friends, work trips
• vacations
• school
• homework
• special events
• taking a shower
• getting school supplies
• family celebrations
• kids homework
• date night
• doctor appointments
• lunch/dinner
• salon time
• and on and on

Or put simply, “I’m just too busy.”

Why would you want to even spend time learning this?

Why use up your time training if you don’t think anyone will ever attack you? The truth is we get ‘attacked’ almost daily. Have ever been in situations where someone said something to you/about you/or cut you off before you could finish? And you didn’t like how you felt (your body’s reaction)? You could not think of anything to say (or do).

Daily we must make choices. People come in and out of our lives, and often we are left with a brief encounter in which we were unable to respond as we wanted to, and come away feeling just a bit depleted because they got the ‘best of us,’ or they got their way (again). IOW, they took some of our power (and that is because we let them).

Think about your daily interactions with others. You truly DON’T know what you will do in any situation, trained or not. And that is simply because we cannot predict the future. You will only know in the moment. If you are caught off guard, the outcome can be anywhere from disheartening to devastating.

What is this training about, and why even train?

Training IS about you. In your entire world, you are the most important. Taking care of you first allows taking care of others from a balanced perspective. You will simply make better choices for everyone involved. Your confidence will inspire others. And a myriad of other good things will happen for you when you raise your confidence.

Training builds the muscle memory I talked about earlier. It is not your brain that defends you. It is your body. Let me repeat that: it is your body that defends you. Your body gets it’s messages from the nervous system. The nervous system then allows the reactions. And your body will react with whatever memory is in it. Just thinking about it won’t replace the old memory (for most people, anyway).

Physical reactions and powerful verbal strategies require training time (for reprogramming). Your body needs the time to integrate the new memory—time actually spent on moving thru the motions and movements, and time spent on versing the words to say in difficult situations, and quickly getting past the ‘stuck’ or ‘freeze’ reaction in the ‘flight-fight-freeze’ responses with which most people react.

Repetition is key

Repetition will ingrain voice commands and help to create powerful muscle memory. And that’s because our bodies are more brilliant than our minds. This one too bears repeating: our bodies are more brilliant than our minds. Our bodies rule our world.

Our legs are for more than just walking

Knowing you have instantaneous reactions, builds confidence. Instantaneous reactions come from repetition. Knowing you can knock out a perpetrator, builds confidence. It requires repetition. Knowing you can control the body of another person builds confidence. This too requires repetition. Is that a waste of time? Let’s look at how else this confidence, from all the repetition, could benefit your life.

• How about ‘commanding’ respect? (different from demanding)
• Being listened to when you speak?
• Standing up and speaking your mind when you see a ‘wrong’
• Saying ‘no’ when you mean no, and ‘yes’ when you mean yes
• Standing up for others?
• Speaking to a boardroom full of (mostly) males?
• Asking for the raise
• Letting your co-worker know s/he is a bully
• Standing up to overbearing/bullying parents?
• Standing up to your own kids? (yes, this happens)
• Quitting your job
• Getting up on a stage and speaking
• Making your own choices, daily

Does any of this connect with you?

Building confidence through learning to fight is not just about physically defending yourself. It is about standing UP for what you believe to be true and correct, standing in your center, unwaveringly confident in your choices. And knowing you have something to back it up. It is about being the “badass” of your life.

Learning to defend yourself is not hard. What is hard is admitting it out loud (even to yourself), that you need some training.

I have never been attacked (ok, lol, in 7th grade once, this bully girl who did not like me, caught me alone and hit me once, then walked off). I never encountered her again face to face. I don’t even remember if she got in trouble for it.

Yet, years later, training in self-defense became important to me. I did it because at first it was fun, and then I really wanted to feel that I could defend myself (fight) when I was alone, and then I continued to train because of the confidence it built within my entire body. During the process, my thinking changed. And then I continued because I wanted to pass it on to others.

Our community has unfortunately not gotten any safer over the years, and so my work continues. It is up to each of us to be able to help ourselves when the police, or anyone in our support system, are not present. We simply must empower ourselves. We must make time for our daughters (and sons) to learn skills and strategies for defending and protecting themselves.

Wherever you are on the safety spectrum, more training will be good…always. If raising your safety quotient matters to you, and you know that ‘someday’ you will get some training, my question to you is ‘how long are you willing to wait?’ Every single day is the day to commit. Start. Do it. Cultivate your #BadassCourage starting now. Be the #Badass Boss of your Life. And do it with Respect and Love.

Upcoming training: Learn more HERE.

Sincerely,

Clara E Minor
#BadassBoss of MINORSAN Self-Defense & Fitness
Master Trainer/Instructor
831-58-0900
Or Contact Me HERE

 

Filed Under: Fitness & Health, Martial Arts/Self-Defense, News Tagged With: #badasscourage, confidence, fighting, martial arts, martial arts classes, self-confidence, self-defense, self-protection, women, women fighters, women instructors

Breaking up is hard to do…lol

June 11, 2017 by Clara E Minor Leave a Comment

 

Breaking Up is Hard To Do - CA

Well… I never thought I’d be saying or doing this…after 9 years of having Zumba on my studio schedule, it’s time to let it go. Sad and happy at the same time. I started Zumba because of my LOVE of dancing. I have been moving to sounds since I was at least 7 years old. (Can’t remember earlier than that…lol). My parents were both music movers (social ballroom dancers). And when I saw Tanya’s Beardsley’s vid (like many of us) almost 10 years ago, I was hooked. I knew I had to teach Zumba.

It was so popular, that I held “how-to” classes for the community. Many of you came to those. And they were often free. They were a hit. My classes were a hit, as were the classes of my other instructors. Zumba was everywhere. As with many new formats, they have a peak, and then they drop into the valley of their comfort zone. Just as kickboxing did. It peaked in 2002-2003, and then started declining; but the decline was mostly in gyms. Private martial arts studios are still rocking with it today. It is still my most popular workout (KickAeroBix™).

In some areas, Zumba is still huge! The decline has been mostly in the USA, although some instructors can still draw huge crowds! Zumba will never go away. We are a dance community. It will be in Santa Cruz for a long time. And we have many quality instructors still teaching it all over our community!

Fast forward to today. My focus is clear now. When I went solo with my studio (2010), I had to go through lots of ‘changes’ and mostly they were in my head. At that time, there was no reason to let go of Zumba classes.

As I got more and more focused on my purpose and my brand, I realized that Zumba was not truly aligned with the rest of my programs. Although dance is my love, and has been for my entire life, the Universe has sent me into a slightly different direction. My programming has to reflect what my purpose has become.

I am so thankful and grateful that I provided Zumba classes. My circle of friends has grown because of Zumba! I’ve had the privilege of having some awesome instructors on my staff (and subs) over the years (in alpha by first names!) : Amanda Clark, Brenda Sproule, Carolyn Wormhoudt, Deb Voison, Dixie Mills, Elizabeth Charlton, Eugenia Rice, Itziar, Janet Antolini, Jenna Giuliani, Jillian Chesley, Joanie Vigil, Joann Tassone, Joanna Dover, John Perez, Linda Pearson, Michelle Bjorkman, Shauna Horton, Sierra Varela! And thank you to Terry DelDiego for teaching at our awesome Holiday Z Party, and Jim Furlong for drumming!THANK YOU ALL! It’s been a long and happy trip!

With that, I bid adieu to Zumba Fitness® classes, and HELLO to STRONG by Zumba®! Yes, we have a new format on the horizon. I will probably launch this in September. It is HITT training (as compared to HIIT). The emphasis on the first T is Tempo. High Intensity Tempo Training. I have already taken the training. I love this format! It will so closely align with my other programming. You can google YouTube vids and watch it. There is no dance in it whatsoever. They did have a bit of dance in the early stages of this format, as they felt they needed a transition for all the Z peeps who knew just dancing fitness.

Now they have realized that it is not necessary anymore and have phased out all dancing. It is STILL to the BEAT of the MUSIC! That is what makes it so fun. (What we do in KickAeroBix and BodyPump).

No worries, Pilates and Yoga peeps…those classes are a great complement to our other intense workouts. Pilates Barre (Brenda) Pilates Mat (Jenna) and Yoga (Connie) are awesome classes, and they are staying!
So stay tuned for info on our launch!

Until next time…

Clara E Minor
Master Instructor/Trainer @ Minorsan Self-Defense & Fitness
minorsan.com
contact@minorsan.com

Filed Under: Fitness & Health, Martial Arts/Self-Defense, News Tagged With: #badasscourage, fitness, fitness classes, Santa Cruz California, self-confidence, strong by zumba, weight loss, zumba, zumba fitness

Minorsan Has Moved!

October 4, 2016 by Clara E Minor Leave a Comment

Minorsan has Moved and Morning Classes are at The Tannery

Minorsan-Has-Moved! - CA

Monday – Friday morning classes are being held at The Tannery!

Classes start October 3, 2016.

We are very excited about this collaboration with The Tannery. It is such a great space to just be, and a great space to move. See our online Schedule to see the class times/room. Please bear with us as we work through all the details of the Schedule. Some slots may change.

Our biggest change is for Wednesday morning: Zumba is at 11:30 am, and BodyPump is at 12:30 pm. (Now Wed & Fri Zumba both at 11:30 am!).

And we are very excited to begin evening and Sat/Sun morning classes on October 25, at Garfield Park Community Church! This is another great collaboration within our community. Another great venue to hang out, and to move our bodies! The Church and its entire campus has been revamped, renovated, and is now a beautiful space.

In the meantime, we are offering Tabata workouts (30 mins each) to all members of Minorsan, at 6:00 pm on the Garfield Park Church Lawn. The first was October 3, and it was a hit! Even if you have never taken a Tabata class, you are welcome to join us. Bring a friend and check it out together. It’s always more fun with 2, or 3, or 4 or 5! Bring as many friends as you would like. Anyone new to Minorsan can take one free! Anyone can do a 30-minute class…

We will update when we are open at Garfield Park Church for all classes.

Filed Under: Fitness & Health, Martial Arts/Self-Defense, News Tagged With: #badasscourage, childrens martial arts, fight for life, fitness classes, HIIT classes, kickboxing, martial arts, martial arts classes, minorsan move, self -esteem, self worth, self-confidence, self-defense, strength, Tabata Bootcamp

How Addicted to Sugar are You?

July 14, 2016 by Clara E Minor Leave a Comment

My addiction goes back a long way…

At 2 months of age I was fed canned milk diluted with water. The milk was sweetened. That was the ‘formula’ at the time, if babies could not breastfeed, for whatever reason. I was so addicted as a kid, I would take the flower decorations on birthday cakes from others kids’ cake (who didn’t want it), and eat them all! They were made with food coloring and hardened sugar.

At the Santa Clara County Fair I would eat an entire cotton candy (ok, maybe not the whole thing, but most of it), a red candied apple, and a strawberry shortcake (yes, I was stuffed, wanted to hurl, and sometimes did when I got home…lol). I visited the dentist a lot.

And to this day, it is still easy for me to crave ‘sweet,’ so I do the best I can to avoid it. Mostly I can, and do, avoid it. I choose to find alternatives to refined white sugar. There are a lot of alternatives on the market these days.

 Most packed foods contain some form of sugar

If they are sweetened, then you are guaranteed there is some form of sweetener added to almost everything.In fact, sugar has been added to most packaged foods for decades. (See the link below to find the list of different names which are used in ingredient lists.) It is truly one of the hardest addictions to stop. Sugar is more pervasive than any drug or substance out there, as it is available literally everywhere.

You don’t see ads on television selling heroin, cocaine or cigarettes (anymore), or any other illicit drugs for that matter. Even though prescription drugs are a huge epidemic, again, they are not added to most of the packaged foods on grocery shelves.

And, yes, even ‘natural foods stores’ carry packaged goods that can easily contain some form of sugar. Most sweetened goods in these stores do contain sugar in one form or another.

In fact, it is hard to get any type of sweet packaged goods (cookies, pastries, pies, cakes, etc) that do not have any type of refined sugar. I often end up making my own. I’m very conscious of what I eat and avoid sugar most days. (I still eat it sometimes!) Very often fresh fruit will suffice.

And, no, it’s not easy to go from full out sugar addiction to eating just fruit to satisfy. It takes time, consistency, persistence, desire, and the willingness to check out different forms of sweet. And I know I am not alone in this.

We eat sugar because, mostly, we crave it. How can you change what your body craves? Keep in mind (if you didn’t already know), you crave what you eat the most…always. Check out what you buy when you grocery shop…every time. Most people buy the same things, almost the same brands, over and over and over.

If this is you, and you want to change your eating habits, but don’t know where to start or what alternatives you have, you can learn all about foods, and how to safely and most effectively make changes.

Members learn about this in Tabata Bootcamp. It really is the only program where we delve into nutritional guidelines, and educate people about their food choices. This is one of the essentials in our Tabata Bootcamp team meetings. These weekly team meetings are an integral part of each Bootcamp. You can find out much more about Tabata Bootcamp at the next Intro-Teaser Day. Click here to read more and sign up. For the list of sugars, here is the list:

Here is the list of the names of sugar

Contact me if you you want more info on Tabata Bootcamp.

Sincerely,

Clara E Minor
Master Trainer-Instructor
Minorsan Self-Defense & Fitness
831-458-0900

Filed Under: Fitness & Health, Martial Arts/Self-Defense, News Tagged With: #badasscourage, be kind, beliefs, confidence, courage, diabetes, exercise, fat loss, fight for life, fitness class, fitness classes, health, healthy living, heart disease physical exercise, HIIT, HIIT classes, HIIT training, lifestyle, nutrition, self -esteem, self worth, self-confidence, self-love, success, sugar, sugar addiction, Tabata, Tabata Bootcamp, weight loss, worthiness

Sugar’s Hidden Names

July 14, 2016 by Clara E Minor Leave a Comment

Sugar's Hidden NameSugar comes with many names

These are not the only names, btw...

Here is a list of the many names that are used for 'sugars' in packaged foods. Read your labels carefully. It hides in a lot of ways. If you are wanting to get healthier, this is one huge big first step. Just begin reading your labels and educate yourself about the hidden sugars in foods. You don't know what you don't know. Get educated. Take your own lead. Make your own changes. On your own time.

Here is a list of most of the names of sugars:

All natural evaporated cane juice
Barley malt
Beet molasses
Beet sugar
Beet syrup
Brown sugar
Buttered syrup
Cane crystals
Cane juice
Cane juice crystals
Cane juice powder
Cane sugar
Caramel
Confectioner’s sugar
Corn sugar (HFCS)
Corn syrup (HFCS)
Corn syrup solids (HFCS)
Corn sweetener (HFCS)
Crystal dextrose
Crystalline fructose
Crystallized organic cane juice
Dark brown sugar
Dehydrated sugar cane juice
Dextrin
Dextran
Dextrose
D-fructose
Diastatic malt
Diatase
Disaccharide
Dried evaporated cane juice
Evaporated organic cane juice
Fructose (HFCS)
Fructose crystals (HFCS)
Fructose sweetener (HFCS)
Fruit juice concentrate
Glucose
Golden sugar
Granulated fructose
Granulated sugar
Granulated sugar cane juice
Inulin (HFCS)
Invert sugar
Invert syrup
Lactose
Light brown sugar
Malt
Malted corn and barley syrup
Maltitol
Maltitol syrup
Maltodextrin
Malt syrup
Mannitol
Organic sugar
Organic Cane Juice
Organic Cane Juice Crystals
Organic Cane Syrup
Organic Cane Juice Concentrate
Powdered sugar
Pure cane syrup
Raw Sugar
Rice maltodextrin
Rock sugar
Saccharose
Simple syrup
Sorbitol
Sorbitol syrup
Sucrose
Sugar
Sugar beet syrup
Sugar beet crystals
Sugar cane juice
Sugar cane natural
Sweet sorghum syrup
Table sugar
Trisaccharides
Turbinado sugar
Unrefined sugar
White crystal sugar
White sugar
Xylose

If you want to eliminate sugar from your daily foods (or at least lessen how much you eat), be sure you read your labels. If you'd like some options on how to cook/bake with different sweeteners, contact me.

Sincerely,

Clara E Minor
Master Trainer-Instructor
Minorsan Self-Defense & Fitness
831-458-0900

Filed Under: Fitness & Health, News Tagged With: #badasscourage, be kind, bootcamp, courage, doubt, empowerment, exercise, fat loss, fear, fight for life, fighting, fitness classes, habits, high intensity workouts, kickboxing, life success, martial arts classes, negotiating, Santa Cruz California, self -esteem, self worth, self-care, self-confidence, self-love, success, Tabata, Tabata Bootcamp, take action, weight loss

Congratulations to our Winners!

May 16, 2016 by Clara E Minor Leave a Comment

Yes, congratulations winners! We had 5 Winners.

Workin' our booth

Workin’ our booth

Here are a couple of vids we took regarding the Women’s Health & Lifestyle Expo at the Coconut Grove in Santa Cruz, on May 12. All our Challengers did soooo well!

Congratulations Angelica Torentino, Sue Renner, Jessica Williams, Jackie Christinson, and Brittany Saunders!

Congratulations Everyone for gettin’ on your ‪#‎BadassCourage‬! 42 people took on a Challenge!

Watch what these 3 won…Thank You to Robin Ludington, Denice Kowalski and members who helped with the drawings.

https://www.minorsan.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/IMG_1070.m4v
https://www.minorsan.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/IMG_0001.m4v

If you missed this event, you will want to get on this for next year. They provided free food bites, free drink, free giveaways, free screenings (!), prize drawings, and you could make purchases from the many local businesses that were there supporting Women’s Healthy Lifestyles in Santa Cruz, CA. Minorsan will be there for sure again next year. And we will have our Challenges again. You could win a 3-Month Fitness Package, a Tabata Bootcamp, 3-Month Kickboxing Package, 3-Month Martial Arts Package, or an 8-Module Self-Defense Course for 2! See you at this fantastic event next year!

Clara E Minor
Master Instructor-Trainer
Minorsan Self-Defense & Fitness

Filed Under: Fitness & Health, Martial Arts/Self-Defense, News Tagged With: #badasscourage, fitness classes, kickboxing, martial arts, martial arts classes, self-confidence, self-defense, Tabata Bootcamp

Are You Nice or Kind?

April 20, 2016 by Clara E Minor Leave a Comment

Are You Nice or KindThe other night I was teaching one of the Self-Defense modules, and the subject of ‘nice’ and ‘kind’ came up. It’s interesting how much we know the difference, yet often fall into being ‘nice’ rather than kind.’ Are you nice or kind?

Why the Indoctrination

Our indoctrination into being ‘nice’ started when we were very young. Parents and caretakers not wanting to be seen as ‘bad parents’ often chastised us into being ‘nice’ when we did something/said something that was not socially acceptable, to or at another person. Instead of telling us what to do correctly, they simply told us to be ‘nice.’ This conditioning has led many of us to ‘give up something,’ as one individual stated in the Self-Defense class.

‘Nice people’ are always giving up something to someone else. Nice people want what I call “The 7 A’s:” Approval, Acceptance, Attention, Acknowledgement, Affection, Adoration, Agreement. They want people to LIKE them. They have a great fear of rejection, and have a hard time with confrontation. They don’t want to ‘rock the boat.’ She’s your aunt, be nice. He’s the gardener, be nice. She’s the pharmacist, be nice. He’s the doctor, be nice. He’s your playmate, be nice. He’s my friend, be nice. He’s your uncle, be nice. They also make the easiest victims to all levels of crime. Perpetrators can smell this. Being nice is an emotional challenge for sure, always giving up something to someone else.

This can be detrimental to you and your safety

Perpetrators use being ‘nice’ as a way to manipulate and deceive. They know how to act it. They want to build your trust. So they are ‘nice’ to you. They give you compliments, offer to help you, ask seemingly innocent questions (I say ‘seemingly’ because someone asking you where Bay Street is located doesn’t seem like an out-of-line question, however, with every word you speak, a perpetrator is gathering information about you. More about this another time.)

Being ‘kind’ on the other hand is a state of being in control of your power. A kind person is able to “CUE,” show Compassion, Understanding, and Empathy, without allowing others to step all over you. The moment you are uncomfortable, you check in. What are you sensing? What are you feeling? What is this person attempting?

You Don't Need to Like Everyone

Being kind does not mean you have to like a person. It does not mean you are going to be friends forever. Or even at all. You can show kindness to someone, and still not like them. You may not agree with anything about them, you may not like their level of integrity, you may not approve of their morals and ethics, however, you still treat them with kindness because, well, they really haven’t done anything to harm/hurt/violate you. You simply don’t have the right chemistry with them.

I’ve heard of so many instances where one child does or says something ‘bad’ to another child and instead of finding out what caused the confrontation in the first place, the adult present tells the child to just ‘be nice.’ Being ‘nice’ is how that adult resolves it. This is totally disempowering to a child.

And What About You

If you find yourself always saying ‘yes’ to everyone around you, check in. What are your reasons? Are they truly valid for you? Is it that you can’t stand confrontation? (Nobody likes it, really.) Or are they reasons that ‘give away,’ so you can feel good that they are happy because you complied. In your mind this means that they will now like you. In their mind, many will be happy because they are getting what they want. They are using you. And you let them.

Kindness and compassion are truly separate and distinct from being a ‘nice guy.’ Ellen doesn’t say (at the end of her shows) “be nice to one another.” She clearly always states “be kind to one another.” There is a huge difference.

Shifting niceness into kindness is huge change. If you’d like to do some work around this, contact me through the website.

Clara E Minor
Master Trainer/Instructor
MINORSAN Self-Defense & Fitness
831-458-0900
minorsan.com

Filed Under: Fitness & Health, Martial Arts/Self-Defense, News Tagged With: #badasscourage, be kind, confidence, empowerment, martial arts, martial arts classes, Santa Cruz California, self -esteem, self-confidence, self-defense, self-love

What is #BadassCourage?

January 18, 2016 by Clara E Minor Leave a Comment

.

 

 

Single arm takedown Every move re-educates the muscles.

Ahhhh...Courage—

It evokes pictures of some courageous and strong people we all know, or have seen in movies—I think of Braveheart, Wonder Woman, and other SuperHeroes.

The Reverend Dr Martin Luther King Jr., airline pilots (who have successfully landed an ailing aircraft full of people), and others we hear about in the news, are the ‘big’ people.

They are ones who have an impact on many. They are all ‘BadassCourageous.’ There is even a local SuperHero who saved another woman from a continued sexual attack. Here she is. And she is 15 years old.

local hero girl

When I think of people I know, besides our Local SuperHero mentioned above, those who come to mind are the ones who:

• decided to quit their job and go back to school

• broke off a toxic relationship

• decided to move to the other side of the World

• have opened a business solo

• went overseas alone (knowing only the English language)

• decided to get up on a stage for the first time

• presented an idea to ‘experts’

• published their first book

• decided to confront someone in power

• told her/his employer why they deserved the raise

• confronted the bully in their office (or at a school)

• moved out of a house that no longer served her/his needs

• left a relationship that was toxic

• and so many more

We have all accomplished courageous things in our lives...and not always recognized them as being courageous. Just walking into a fitness facility or a martial arts studio takes courage for so many.

What about you?

What courageous acts have you created so far in your life? Absolutely no need to be a SuperHero to have Courage. We all do courageous things all the time. Most often we see them as ‘life challenges.’ And life challenges absolutely cultivate our courage. Everyone has a story. What are your stories?

The one fear I hear the most in my line of work is the fear of going out alone. What is the true fear here? It is the fear of getting hurt by an attack, and not knowing what to do, or having the resources to be safe. It is so much easier to stay home. So we limit ourselves. We limit our life experiences. We limit our freedom. We settle for limited lives.

The fear of embarrassment and rejection, often go hand in hand. For this reason we don’t introduce ourselves at an event where we might not know very many people. Some of us won’t even go to a party alone. If we do go, we might sit in ‘our spot’ the entire night.

Or we fear getting up in front of a group of people and speaking our minds. How many times have you seen an empty dance floor…only to begin filling up after one brave soul went out there to dance (that would be me…lol. And I usually don’t wait long. When a danceable song I like comes on, I’m there).

There are so many instances whereby we allow our fears to stop us from living a full, free, and happy life. It’s easier to be mediocre, normal, let others have their way, and we settle for where we are because it is in our comfort zone.

‘Confrontation is just too hard'

We can only develop courage when we charge ahead through our fears. This is the only (and I emphasize only) way to build courage.

woman punching focus mitts

Learning to 'follow-through' ensures you will hit with all ya got


So now think of how you would respond if your life was in danger. Is it scary just thinking about it? Our brains all ‘think’ of what we would do. You can think it over and over, and you will end up reacting with what is in your body at the moment. You will truly never know until it happens. Being prepared is absolutely one of life's 'best practices.'

From my experience in teaching self-defense and martial arts programs  these past 36 years, our bodies are the ones who will respond. Not our minds.

Courage is not in our heads. Courage is in our bodies, as are all emotions. Think of sadness. Have you ever lost a loved one? Lost a love? Lost anyone in your life whom you valued? Where do you feel the pain? In your head? I don’t think so. The pain resides in our hearts. The pain is real.

If we could do it, most of us would just pull out the pain with our hands. However, because it is energy we cannot ‘pull’ it out. Most of us simply cannot physically ‘grasp’ energy. We cannot ‘will’ it away either. (If you can, show me how please…(I want to ‘lol’ here, as I don’t think anyone will come thru with the ‘how-to’ on this one.) And what is the most common method to release that pain? Tears. Tears allow healing, as they allow the emotion to release. This is not news. We all know this.

How will courage work In confrontations?

We have three choices: Fight - Flight - Freeze. Which one will work for you? In any situation—even in a conversation with a relative, or the bully at work, or school, or someone in power, which response will your body elicit?

Gonna talk about ‘freeze’ for a sec here. When we ‘freeze’ as in paralyzing fear, or someone says something to us that makes us clam-up (and we truly didn’t want to clam-up!), how do we get out of that frozen state?

Maybe the person walked away before we could say what we really wanted to say. Then we’re left depleted, discouraged, dis-enheartened, belittled, feel like we ‘lost,’ etc. And it can easily bring tears.

What could you do to get out of the ‘freeze response?’

What in your body allows you to move this frozen energy? If you guessed ‘take a deep breath’ you are correct. Is that a thought in your brain? It could start as a ‘reminder’…”oh yeah, breathe.” However, the breathing itself is a body-response. Your deep breath clears your mind, as it allows fresh blood to flow into it with the renewed oxygen flow, thus unfreezing your body. This is another gift we were given as humans. This deep breath allows you to also relax which is the cornerstone for stress-reduction.

So now let’s look at someone physically coming at you in a threatening manner. Time and again I have asked people new to ‘quick-reaction-body-knowledge’ to show me what they would do.

I even let them know what I am going to do (how I will ‘attack’ them). Now bear in mind, I make sure that everyone is safe in this exercise—no one is getting punched out or knocked to the floor).

Time and time again, they freeze, or move in a way that would allow me to continue to overpower them or re-attack (if I was a ‘bad’ person). Even though in their heads they may have thought of what they will do, their response is quite short of what they were thinking.

Sometimes I tell them exactly how they will be confronted, then show them exactly what to do, and they still do something different. Why is this? Because that is what is in the body. That is the memory of the body—the knowledge and intelligence of the body. The body’s brilliance.

The muscles can only move with the knowledge the body contains.

Our entire lifetimes we are inputting information (emotion) into our bodies. When therapists can elicit something that was ‘deeply buried’ inside of someone, where was it buried? Our brains are only thoughts. The energy of that past experience is buried in our bodies. It comes out most readily with our tears.

So then, how do we change the response of the muscles to move in the most efficient way to be safe?

two women demonstrating self-defense

It starts with the input the nervous system receives. When physical confrontations happens, the messages are sent through the eyes into the brain’s nervous system and then into the body. In order to change how the muscles react, we must re-educate them.

This does not happen in one hour or even one day or one week. It takes hours and hours of time, depending on the severity of the response (or non-response) to re-educate the muscles.

When the muscles have this new knowledge in them, it creates a response in the brain that gives us the confidence needed to move through fear and challenges with courage. When our bodies know that we can knock out a perpetrator, the confidence rises, we become more relaxed, and we have now created what I call #BadassCourage:

• the ability to stand your ground

• centered and balanced

• speak your truth, regardless of what other people think or say about you, and regardless of the possible consequences

• find your own freedom

You fight to defend yourself, and come out on top (it may all be verbal). You are not fighting for mediocrity. Who wants to 'kind of-sort of' feel good? You are fighting within to ‘win the battle.’ You might end up with a few ‘battle scars.’ And those are good, because you fought the fight. You did it. You defended yourself. I see these as ‘Badges of Badass.’

You will find your voice when you develop your #BadassCourage. Start by collecting your own Badges of Badass.

Finding your voice allows you to make the choices that work for you (and those you love). It allows you to stand up for yourself. It allows you to speak up. Be bold. Be creative. Achieve your own freedom. And that is where you will find your happy place. It will allow you to live the life you want.

Contact me if you are interested in finding out more about your own BadassCourage (complimentary consultation), and how your life can totally change in a positive, powerful way.

Sincerely,

Clara E Minor
Master Instructor/Trainer
MINORSAN Self-Defense & Fitness

#badasscourage
#fight4YOURlife
#badgesofbadass
#selfdefense
#martialarts
#womenspower
#womensmartial arts

Filed Under: Fitness & Health, Martial Arts/Self-Defense, News Tagged With: #badasscourage, beliefs, courage, doubt, fear, martial arts, self -esteem, self worth, self-care, self-confidence, self-defense, self-love, speak up, strength, take action

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