Explore the concept of badasscourage as a force that drives you to overcome challenges fearlessly and take bold actions.
Every move re-educates the muscles.
Ahhhh…What is BadassCourage—
BadassCourage evokes pictures of some courageous and strong people we all know, or have seen in movies—I think of Braveheart, Wonder Woman, and numerous SuperHeroes.
Clearly you can see #badasscourage reflected thru the actions of The Reverend Dr Martin Luther King Jr., airline pilots (who successfully land ailing aircraft full of people), Sojourner Truth who singlehandedly helped people to freedom, and so many others you hear about in the news everyday.
These people with #badasscourage are the ones who have an impact on many. They are all ‘BadassCourageous.’ There’s even a local SuperHero who saved another woman from a continued sexual attack by . Here she is, and by the way, she’s 15 years old (in this photo).
When I think of people I know, besides our Local SuperHero mentioned above, those who come to mind, who all have #badasscourage, are the ones who:
• decided to quit their job and go back to school
• broke off a toxic relationship
• movee to the other side of the World
• have opened a business solo
• went overseas alone (knowing only the English language)
• got up on a stage for the first time
• presented an idea to ‘experts’
• published their first book
• confronted someone in power
• told her/his employer why they deserved the raise
• challenged the bully in their office (or at a school)
• moved out of a house that no longer served her/his needs
• left a relationship that was toxic
• and so many more
Beieve it or not, you’ve accomplished courageous things in your life…and not always recognized them as being courageous. Just walking into a fitness studio, a gym, or a martial arts studio takes courage for so many people.
Let’s explore your #badasscourage a bit more
Think about the courageous acts you’ve created so far in your life. Absolutely no need to be a SuperHero to cultivate your #badasscourage. You probably do more courageous things than is apparent. Most often we see big bold actions as ‘life challenges.’ All life challenges absolutely cultivate our courage, however exemplifying #badasscourage doesn’t have to be a big huge ‘thing.’ Small acts can be courageous, seeing that each act builds more courage, and that builds more confidence. More confidence gives you more freedom, since you’re able to speak up more and take bolder actions. These become your stories, and everyone has them. What are your stories?
What’s the ‘thing’ that stops you from action?
When you attempt to cultivate your #badasscourage, what’s at the bottom of things that can get in the way? Summed up in one word—it’s fear. The one fear I hear the most in my line of work is the fear of going out alone. What’s the truth behind this? It’s the fear of getting hurt by an attack, and not knowing what to do, or having the resources to be safe. It’s so much easier to stay home, and as a consequence, we limit ourselves and our life experiences. Our freedom becomes somewhat ‘cocooned’ and this creates a ‘limited’ life.
Embarrassment and rejection
These often go hand in hand since it’s embarrassing to get rejected, especially publicly. For this reason you hesitate to introduce yourself at an event where most of the people might be strangers. Some of us won’t even go to a party alone because of the fear of not having anyone to talk to. If we do go, we might sit in ‘our spot’ the entire night, given that it’ll allow us to feel comfortably uneasy sitting against a wall.
Speaking your mind
The fear of getting up in front of a group and speaking your mind can be daunting, as you know everyone will be looking at you. How many times have you seen an empty dance floor…only to begin filling up after one brave soul went out there to dance (that would be me…lol. And I usually don’t wait long. When a danceable song I like comes on, I’m there).
Seems that nobody wants to be the first, as you know if it’s you, everyone is going to be ‘staring’ at you. (By the way, it’s a good thing to fall in love with people staring at you. It’ll do wonders for your confidence, given that you’ll be comfortable in front of others.)
There are so many instances whereby we allow our fears to stop us from living a full, free, and happy life. It’s easier to be mediocre, normal, let others have their way, and we settle for where we are because it is in our comfort zone.
‘Confrontation is just too hard’
You can only develop courage when you charge ahead through your fears. This is the only (and I emphasize only) way to build courage. Nobody can do t for you.
Learning to ‘follow-through’ ensures you will hit with all ya got
So now think of how you would respond if your life was in danger. Is it scary just thinking about it? Our brains all ‘think’ of what we would do. You can think it over and over, and you will end up reacting with what is in your body at the moment. You will truly never know until it happens. Being prepared is absolutely one of life’s ‘best practices.’
From my experience in teaching self-defense and martial arts programs these past 36 years, our bodies are the ones who will respond. Not our minds.
Courage is not in our heads
Courage is in our bodies, as are all emotions. Think of sadness. Have you ever lost a loved one? Lost a love? Lost anyone in your life whom you valued? Where do you feel the pain? In your head? I don’t think so. The pain resides in our hearts. The pain is real.
If we could do it, most of us would just pull out the pain with our hands. However, because it is energy we cannot ‘pull’ it out. Most of us simply cannot physically ‘grasp’ energy. We cannot ‘will’ it away either. (If you can, show me how please…(I want to ‘lol’ here, as I don’t think anyone will come thru with the ‘how-to’ on this one.) And what is the most common method to release that pain? Tears. Tears allow healing, as they allow the emotion to release. This is not news. We all know this.
How will courage work In confrontations?
We have three choices: Fight – Flight – Freeze. Which one will work for you? In any situation—even in a conversation with a relative, or the bully at work, or school, or someone in power, which response will your body elicit?
Gonna talk about ‘freeze’ for a sec here. When we ‘freeze’ as in paralyzing fear, or someone says something to us that makes us clam-up (and we truly didn’t want to clam-up!), how do we get out of that frozen state?
Maybe the person walked away before we could say what we really wanted to say. Then we’re left depleted, discouraged, dis-enheartened, belittled, feel like we ‘lost,’ etc. And it can easily bring tears.
What could you do to get out of the ‘freeze response?’
What in your body allows you to move this frozen energy? If you guessed ‘take a deep breath’ you are correct. Is that a thought in your brain? It could start as a ‘reminder’…”oh yeah, breathe.” However, the breathing itself is a body-response. Your deep breath clears your mind, as it allows fresh blood to flow into it with the renewed oxygen flow, thus unfreezing your body. This is another gift we were given as humans. This deep breath allows you to also relax which is the cornerstone for stress-reduction.
So now let’s look at someone physically coming at you in a threatening manner. Time and again I have asked people new to ‘quick-reaction-body-knowledge’ to show me what they would do.
I even let them know what I am going to do (how I will ‘attack’ them). Now bear in mind, I make sure that everyone is safe in this exercise—no one is getting punched out or knocked to the floor).
Time and time again, they freeze, or move in a way that would allow me to continue to overpower them or re-attack (if I was a ‘bad’ person). Even though in their heads they may have thought of what they will do, their response is quite short of what they were thinking.
Why do people react differently?
Sometimes I tell them exactly how they will be confronted, then show them exactly what to do, and they still do something different. Why is this? Because that is what is in the body. That is the memory of the body—the knowledge and intelligence of the body. The body’s brilliance.
The muscles can only move with the knowledge the body contains.
Our entire lifetimes we are inputting information (emotion) into our bodies. When therapists can elicit something that was ‘deeply buried’ inside of someone, where was it buried? Our brains are only thoughts. The energy of that past experience is buried in our bodies. It comes out most readily with our tears.
How do you change this?
So then, how do you change the response of the muscles to move in the most efficient way to be safe?
It starts with the input the nervous system receives. When physical confrontations happens, the messages are sent through the eyes into the brain’s nervous system and then into the body. In order to change how the muscles react, we must re-educate them.
This does not happen in one hour or even one day or one week. It takes hours and hours of time, depending on the severity of the response (or non-response) to re-educate the muscles.
When the muscles have this new knowledge in them, it creates a response in the brain that gives us the confidence needed to move through fear and challenges with courage. When our bodies know that we can knock out a perpetrator, the confidence rises, we become more relaxed, and we have now created what I call #BadassCourage:
• the ability to stand your ground</strong>
• be centered and balanced</strong&gt;
<strong>• speak your truth, regardless of what other people think or say about you, and regardless of the possible consequences</strong>
<strong>• find your own freedom </strong>
You fight to defend yourself, and come out on top (it may all be verbal). You are not fighting for mediocrity. Who wants to ‘kind of-sort of’ feel good? You are fighting within to ‘win the battle.’ You might end up with a few ‘battle scars.’ And those are good, because you fought the fight. You did it. You defended yourself. I see these as ‘Badges of Badass.’
Finding your voiYou will find your voice when you develop your #BadassCourage. Start by collecting your own Badges of Badass.
Finding your voice
Badasscourage allows you to make the choices that work for you (and those you love). It allows you to stand up for yourself, and to speak up, which means using your voice. Be bold. Be creative. Achieve your own freedom. And that is where you will find your happy place. It will allow you to live the life you want.
Contact me if you are interested in finding out more about your own BadassCourage (complimentary consultation), and how your life can totally change in a positive, powerful way.
Sincerely,
Clara E Minor
Master Instructor/Trainer
MINORSAN Self-Defense & Fitness
#badasscourage
#fight4YOURlife
#badgesofbadass
#selfdefense
#martialarts
#womenspower
#womensmartial arts